Hold me close, and don't let go

I have always loved being hugged.  When my father would give me big huge bear hugs at night before going to bed...I loved them.  Having him close and feeling him squeeze me until I could barely breath.  Then relief at being able to take in air again, yet wishing that he would keep squeezing me tight.  

There is something about the closeness of a hug that I think we all long for.  Being that close to another human.  Feeling their warmth and love.  And then we grow older and the hugs turn into more of a token, quick, well if I must touch you sort of gesture.  The quick half hearted squeeze that we give someone as they or we are going to be away for a long time.  Letting them know that yes, you will be missed.

As I got older I learned to really appreciate a sincere hug.  Giving another a genuine hug, arms wrapped around another letting them know that they were missed or loved.  Or perhaps to let another know that we feel their pain and that we feel just a little bit what they must be going through.  Or perhaps that we don't know their pain, but want to let them know that we still care, in any way that we can. 

There have been times in my life when faced with difficulties, that I have ached inside for someone, anyone, to see my pain and to give me a long knowing hug.  And times when I have been so happy and excited that I would have loved to throw my arms around another's neck and share my joy with them.

My son, who is almost 13, is wonderful at giving hugs.  I love when he comes up to me, and for no reason gives me a long loving hug.  Sometimes more often than not, also including the words, I love you...you are an amazing mom.  I know he will make a wonderful partner some day to a lucky someone, but for now I will take every hug that he is willing to share with me.  He will soon tower over me, and will have to lean down to my level.  I hope he never forgets to lean down, and really appreciate what a true hug is.

In HIS Arms

Hold me close and don't let go

invite me in to you

wrap your arms around me

envelope me, surround me with your love

holding me close breathing me in

strong, supportive, masculine

everything I have been longing for

you hold me and I relax into you

fully, completely, letting go of the world around me

melting into you like a flower floating on a stream

fully and completely supported

not needing to be anything but what I am

I feel you, taking me in, breathing me in

my energy becoming a part of you

you lift me up, out of myself

thoughts and ideas fleeing from my head

being,  just being

as I soften into you

I feel you...pulling me close

letting me know that you will not let me fall

you are strong, immovable, my strength

Make A List

searching for the pieces of me

longing to find 

the missing parts

that one day would fill

the empty spaces

within my soul 

places that I could never fill

there is a yearning

of what I could never say

never being able 

to put a voice to what was inside

feeling, aching, longing for more

never really understanding

that what was

is not what ultimately could be

never running from

always  moving towards

not to be free of what is

but to embrace what could be

make a list,,,,tell me what you want

what things in your life

do you want to take with you

things have never really been

all that important to me

looking at the things in my life

what would I keep if I had to choose

the feeling of swaying in the moonlight

wrapped in a warm embrace

being led into ecstasy

as we become one dancing together 

the memories of seeing

what once was but two cells

now entering into the world

miraculously  formed into love perfected

the memory of helping another

that could not help themselves

seeing the light in their eyes

as they come to realize

that I am not here for gain

but only to give

expecting nothing in return

seeing the beauty in the world

it abounds all around me

majestic trees that sway in the breeze

sweet sounds of birds that sing to me

as they rest in her branches

the soft and gentle sounds

of the brook as it makes it's way

over the rocks and pebbles

hearing the rustling of the grass

as it dances on the wind

grass up to my waist

reaching up to my fingers

caressing them from the soil below

connecting me to the world

grounding me in her beauty

things cannot go

but feelings, memories

LOVE....that is what I choose

A woman's heart

A woman's heart

is a mysterious thing

full of hope

waiting to love

longing to be let in

hoping beyond hope

it is full of love

and laughter

tears and sadness

tenderness that you can only imagine

wanting to be loved

aching to be held

needing to know...that she is

the light in your eyes

the beat of your heart

the wings that give you flight

that she is the stars in your sky

that when you feel the breeze

it reminds you of her fingers

gentle on your cheek

she needs to know

that you will always be there

when everyone else fails her

you will be there

with tenderness in your eyes

to dry her tears

and hold her, gentle in your arms

she needs to know

that she IS your world

that without her you would be lost

that there is no room in your heart

for anyone but her

and show her, that she is your everything

really show her

and she will be....your everything

more than you could never imagine

let me be your everything

Do you......

Do you

do you see me...looking..searching..longing to be loved

to be able  to show all the parts of me

the parts that no one has seen

the parts that are too tender to display

too delicate for all the world to see

Can you

can you feel me

so much inside that I want to give

so much that I long to express

so much love and tenderness if you are willing to accept

yet feeling if I do....it will go unreceived

Do you

do you know me

my love of nature and the beauty that surrounds us

my genuine love of people...wanting to be of use

feeling every emotion around me, seeping inside me

filling me up...taking it all in....until I finally scream...

I must rest, hide me away, I need to find myself

Do you

do you want me

want me to be the person I am meant to be

the person that is struggling 

trying to escape the chrysalis that surrounds me

wanting to spread my wings

to finally enjoy freedom and flight

Please see me